Incorporating Children into the Ceremony

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That is a beautiful idea. My dad wasnt really around either. He disappeared out of my life when I was 3 or 4. I still remember that day very well. My step dad was his best friend in high school and my moms friend as well. When my dad refused to do anything to take care of us my step dad stepped in. My mom says every winter he would come hang blankets in the windows to block out more cold and bring us food. They got married when I was 8 but didnt have a ceremony. My stepdad never forced me to call him dad or do anything that I didnt want to. I took his last name when they married but changed it back when I found out my legal name wasnt that just to save time. I have since realised how he wasnt sure I saw him as my dad but I did so I got him a keychain for christmas that said "Thanks for being the dad you didnt have to be" as well as I spent time writeing him a letter in the card I got him when he remarried and his birthday card. I have since asked him and his new wife to give me away because in the short time I have known her his new wife has been more of a mother then my mom ever was capable of being (my mom admits this). I plan on buying both of them forms for legal adult adoption because my stepmom said she would adopt me and I know my stepdad tried in the past but my dad refused to sign over custody.

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I believe this is the top option on our list!

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Thank you Taylor! 2 of my daughters are grown - 1 lives outside of the house with her boyfriend. Yet my FH has been there for them since I introduced them to him, more so than my ex-husband. And although my monster-in-law has not made any attempt to even meet them all (she has met my two youngest only), he has taken such a huge role in their lives, it only makes sense to not only have them in our wedding party, but to also have them included in the ceremony itself. He loves them as his own! I appreciate your suggestions very much! I believe we are leaning towards a sand ceremony with different colours coming together as one family, as well as he is purchasing them a very personal necklace vowing to not only be there for their mother but to also be there for them as well - in any capacity they require.

We are doing the sand ceremony, everyone with a different colour

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That is so sweet Im actually getting a bit misty eyed!

When my sister got married she had kind of a vow for her son. I dont remember fully how they did it but basically they had it written in after the whole "i dos" if M would take K to be his son. it was actually very sweet and when they did the kiss they held him and then each kissed a cheek. when it comes to daughters instead of rings get custom bracelets or necklaces that they can wear as long as they want to wear them. my sister also did do the sand ceremony but there is man others you can do depending on the ages. theres the unity candle and tree planting (which is what im doing instead of rings). I think its very sweet that you want them to have a bigger part in the wedding. what is more important isnt what you say or do because they are your daughters. its more impactful to focus on the relationship between him and the girls

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Absolutely! And my wedding is already very untraditional - so it fits right in!

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Thank you Phil! Both are great ideas! We will add those to the options!

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That's very beautiful Casey! Thank you for sharing that! Memorable is exactly what we were looking for!

Phil

That's a good idea and to corporate family in a wedding untraditional.

Hey Chere-Lee, I have often introduced a new family at the end of the ceremony and had them walk up the aisle together as a newly formed unit... aka... " The Smith Family". The other option that I have done is to have them as a part of the presentation at the start of the ceremony... include them in a unique manner so that they feel like it's about their lives blending into yours as well.

Phil

When my mom and step-dad got married, my step-dad said vows to me about promising to be the best dad he could and gave me a little ring as well. My ring had a white gold piece like my mum's ring and a gold piece wrapped around the diamond like my step-dad's ring. I still have the ring and I'm getting it re-sized! I was also a flower girl at the wedding.

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We love the idea of a ring or bracelet for each! We thought it would be so much more meaningful having it presented coming from their new Step-Father. Etsy has many ideas! The one I love the most is a necklace that is boxed with a phrase that says "Today I tell your Mom I do and I promise you forever too". And the necklace has a more personalized message "Marriage made you family, love made you my daughter, with love" and the name of the step-dad and the date of the wedding. I thought this would be a sweet gift presented before the wedding so they can wear them during the ceremony. I love the ring or necklace idea a lot!

For the girls, a ring or bracelet for each of them is nice since they can have something personalized to be presented to them or put on their wrist/finger from you both. It would mean more to them than anything.

View quoted message That's a beautiful idea! So memorable and sentimental! Wonderful idea!

I’ve seen the sand ceremony and unity candle. My step mom had each of the kids (2 of hers, 3 of my dads) carry a small bouquet, maybe 3-4 flowers with a charm. Then once we all got to the front my sister and step sister put all the flowers together to make my step moms big bouquet. She then has a charm from each of us that she wears on her bracelet.

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There are many different options on Etsy!

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Oh for sure! its such a great keep sake too! I love the second one but there is a variety of different designs

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Oh that's a beautiful and creative idea as well! And probably very cost efficient as well. It could be dried and framed! Great idea!

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Thank you! This is even nicer than I had imagined! I'm sure there must be someone who does something like this on Etsy!

The one that I have seen on Pinterest that I would do if either of us had kids would be the Paint Ceremony

Painting ceremony

Obviously just use less paint and more colours

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Here are some idea's to see what mean- I am not sure the costs but if you know anyone who does wood work I would ask them.Family PuzzleFamily Puzzle 2

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I have not heard about puzzle pieces as a way of connecting the family! I love that idea!

My friend did a puzzle- every puzzle piece had their names on each piece and they all came up to connect them

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That is also a very memorable and beautiful option! Thank you!

My parents lit a unity candle I think when they got married and my sister and I were in the wedding party.