Guest list numbers

We had 42 and only 2 said no.

We started out with a list of 85 including our wedding party, we have added to it and currently have 107; to date only 4 people have declined.

We originally invited 125 (our main number was 100). We wound up with 87 attendees. We had a second round of maybes we invited but because it was a month before the date, they couldn't make it. People's lives change in a course of a year. I even had someone who had solid confirmed a year in advance, back out the actual day of the wedding via text 😡
To be honest, I couldn't have been happier with my final number.

You have a year before the wedding. Stuff can happen. Even those who are "for sure yes" now can become an "absolute no" for various reasons within the span of a month, let alone 10.

Only invite who you can house. Set an early RSVP. If someone declines, invite a second round that's enough to fill your seats.

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This was a super helpful way to look at it.

Thank you!

Hi there,



I would make an effort to only invite people you are sure you can afford for the venue. Even though you may leave some people out, just be really careful on sending too many invites.
If you didn’t send invitations out yet…

One way to go about this is having two times of sending out invitations. If you wedding is in June 2024, I would recommend sending your first round of invitations of the max amount of people you are able to afford by February 2024. Ask the first round of invited guests to respond by the end of March. Then if you have anyone who didn’t respond, contact them directly to find out if they can or not. Give yourself a two week buffer (April 1st to April 15th) to do this. Then once you know how many people are unable to join for the day, inviting that number of people in your second round of invitations by middle of April 2024. Ask for a response by the middle of May 2024. For example if 10-15 people say no to attending, only invite 10-15 people in the second round.

If you already sent invitations out…

Try your best to communicate to the “maybe” guests about a time you would like them to get back to you with a solid answer. Make it really clear and avoid just asking without giving a deadline. Sounds harsh to do that to family and friends but a lot of planning goes into a wedding day. For example, ask if they can tell you by February 2024. If you have 10 “maybes”, I would wait for a solid answer before inviting another 10 guests. It’s better to not over invite as you need to consider space, table arrangements, tableware and the list goes on.

I invited 65 guests in my wedding in 2022. We had 45 present including wedding party/us etc the day of. There were people (9 guests) that dropped out the week of our wedding due to travel issues and poor health. Although we could have invited more if we knew, it would not make a difference as people’s lives can be super unpredictable.


I hope this perspective helps!