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Sheri-Lyn
Frequent user May 2022 Ontario

Guest List

Sheri-Lyn, on July 2, 2019 at 12:00 Posted in Before the wedding 0 7

We are having a hard time with our Guest list, there is just so many people we want to share this day with. Smiley sad We have a very large friend group and some I feel I should be able to cut as they are in our big group but not my closest friends. But having a hard time as I don't want to upset anyone and some other friends think I should invite them still..


Second part ...my Fiancee also has a large family with some of his cousins we barely see, we see them once a year for Family Christmas and I can say sometimes we don't even get a change to talk to them at this event. Am I wrong to ask if we can cut them from the guest list??

7 Comments

Latest activity by Erin, on July 3, 2019 at 22:07
  • Erin
    Super May 2022 Ontario
    Erin ·
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    I would also let your budget help decide, don't go over just to accommodate guests who you're not sure you want there.
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  • Bianca
    Master August 2019 Ontario
    Bianca ·
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    I agree with Tori regarding the "waves" of invitations. You first create your "A-List". That is everyone who absolutely must be invited. Then you have your "B-List" and those are the people who you don't need to be there, but can be invited if not enough from your A-List say they're coming. That's what we did and it's working out just fine!

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  • Casey
    Master October 2019 Ontario
    Casey ·
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    I also agree with Tori on the 2 different invite lists. Start with your immediate family, and close friends that you can't celebrate without (make sure you include if they have a plus one or not) and then see how many that brings you to. Then if you have room after that, add more individuals (I would start with family first, then friends)

    When it comes to a bigger family that you do not see a lot, I went off "have I had dinner with this person in the last 6 months - a year", if you have not, I would not include them and if you get comments about it, you can always say you were keeping the guest list smaller, and more intimate.

    It is your day, so you have to make sure you invite who you and your FH want to invite.

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  • Vinod
    Top August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod ·
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    I don't see anything wrong with cutting your list down due to the reason of not speaking or seeing FH cousins as often, which is a rule of thumb i read that is an illimination of the list.

    Those you speak or see often and keeping in touch more on basis get invited. Plus 1s to those you want to add on is fine too knowing you have met their other half.

    In the event those family members and friends don't get invited, have a gathering some time after the wedding and make it a dinner with them on a seperate occasion. This way its more casual and you get to see them celebrating in a smaller group. Optional choice to accept.

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  • Valérie
    VIP September 2019 Quebec
    Valérie ·
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    I agree with Tori here, that you might want to divide your guest lists into groups:

    A List: Your immediate family, best friends and the people you couldn't imagine this day without.

    B List: Extended family, acquaintances, coworkers.

    Here's a good article on tips for navigating your B-List : https://www.brides.com/story/navigating-b-list-wedding-guest-invites

    Also keep in mind that you can't please everyone. It's you and your FH's day, so do what YOU want. Once you've decided on your rules for the guest list, stick to them, because people will try to break them.

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  • Sheri-Lyn
    Frequent user May 2022 Ontario
    Sheri-Lyn ·
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    I guess I should have given more details on this.

    We currently are already not giving plus ones unless serious relationships for friends and cousins/siblings. We have a few friends already thought of for second invites and some maybe only getting invited to join the party and celebrate after dinner so we can include more friends.

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  • Tori
    Top October 2019 Manitoba
    Tori ·
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    1. Perhaps have a second wave of invites? Or you could start out by not including kids or giving plus ones unless they are in a serious relationship?

    2. I would put them on the second wave of invites. I mean, to an extent that's what we did but we made sure that first cousins and whatnot where on the first wave.

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