Gifts??

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I agree! Even if it's a casual backyard wedding and reception, they're still going to have to cover the cost of décor, food, and alcohol (and potentially other expenses too).

Etiquette from what I've heard usually states whatever your plate would cost, at least that. I think though you also have to take your relationships into account and see what is best for your particular situation and how close you are to these friends.

I was always taught growing up that you give the amount that you estimate it costs to have you there as a guest - my grandfather just recently gave $200 per person at a wedding because that is apparently the going rate. However, I would adjust your gift based on your relationship with them as well - backyard wedding, and no gift exchange in the past - I would say around $100 for both - or $150. Totally up to you though!

I don't think the gift should reflect how much the couple is spending on the wedding, but rather how close you are with them and what you feel is comfortable. Disregard the venue and style of wedding when deciding on your gift.

I think it depends on how close you are with the couple. If it's close friends or family, it would make a bit of a difference compared to a co-worker. You could always do a small personalized gift plus money, or even just do a gift that you think they'd love.

I don't judge it based off what it costs to have the person at your wedding, I think it's total personal preference, and your relationship with them.

Many of my aunts and uncles will probably gift us more, but cousins or friends would be less, mostly just due to budget and ability.

Go with what feels comfortable... for a backyard wedding, I think $100 for the both of you is plenty.

There’s no real rule to how much to give as a gift, give them as much or as little as you want, it’s really your choice at the end of the day. If they don’t always think to bring gifts to events that they should, ie your housewarming party, then maybe they aren’t expecting everyone to give them hundreds of dollars!

If you're having trouble coming up with an amount to give, you could always still get them a nice gift even if they don't have a registry. I've gotten nice home decor for others as a wedding gift (Pier One type things - a beautiful rustic clock, wall decor, kitchen gadgets etc) and it has always been well received, some have even said that it was their favourite thing they got. It helps if you know their decor style of course

I love this option because a) they don't usually know how much I spent - you can almost always find something beautiful for a lot less than the $200 and b) it's memorable

This is what I tend to do and although of course we would like to get cash ourselves (who doesn't), I love the idea of having a few nice items that will remind us of our special day and hope someone takes the time to pick us out a keepsake or two.

Cash gifts are about $100 per person or some give together. That isn't covering the food portion/food truck meal or dinner meal.


That amount is to help with the house/apartment down payment or towards a new start towards their goal.

Thank you for all your comments. I guess a little more background is needed. This couple, who are family, were invited to my house warming party and didn't bring a gift or even a card. I don't want to be rude like them, but I'm having a hard time treating them like other people, if you know what I mean.

I agree with the others who have said 'give as much as you would give to anyone else'. It's a gift to your friends, not a cheque to cover your half of the dinner bill.

I would give as much as you would anyone else. The gift is about helping the couple start off their life together. I could understand giving more if it’s an upper class hotel. But I wouldn’t give less because it’s a backyard BBQ. Just my opinion of course! Lol.

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I would do $50 each with a total of $100. No way the food truck will cost more than $50/person

I would still give as much as you would to any other friends wedding (within reason).

It's a buffet and we heard it's a food truck that's bringing food, so $100 for the both of us or $100 each??

I heard for cash gifts you're supposed to give enough to cover your food. I think around $100.