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Susanne
Curious September 2020 Alberta

First ceremony intimate and small and religious, second ceremony relaxed outdoors and what we wanted

Susanne, on October 30, 2019 at 23:52 Posted in Wedding ceremony 0 9
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Since I am catholic and my FH isnt , we always dreamt of having a wedding outdoors in the mountains. However as a catholic, it is recommended to have a church wedding do that the church recognizes the marriage as a sacrament. Since the catholic church doesnt so weddings outside we had to be creative and decided on having one ceremony during the week that is in a catholic church and is small and intimate and focuses on us and God and the other being what we envisioned and having it outside. Clearly the second ceremony will need to be a bit different since we would already be married , but it would include a renewal of our vows and making ot person and everyone would invited to this. I was wondering what people's thoughts are on this if you were guest? Would you be mad that the second ceremony isnt us actually getting married even if we did just 2 days before? I km now if doesnt matter what your guests think because the wedding is about us but just curious.

9 Comments

Latest activity by Amelia, on November 3, 2019 at 01:01
  • Amelia
    Master October 2020 New Brunswick
    Amelia ·
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    I think this is a really cool idea, and a great way to keep everyone happy.


    Have you thought of having a friend or loved one "officiate" the symbolic ceremony? Since it doesn't need to be legal anyone could stand up with you.
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  • Rayanne
    Master June 2022 Ontario
    Rayanne ·
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    As long as the ceremony has meaning to you I wouldn't be too worried about which one I attended. You are celebrating a marriage whether it was that day or two days before hand.
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  • Madisyn
    Expert February 2020 Ontario
    Madisyn ·
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    Our invitations were not traditional at all because we used the online booking system from our travel agents, and they're technically considered save the dates. We have mostly communicated through word of mouth that it's symbolic, everyone is aware of our "legal bonding" date as we're calling it, and we've just noted "symbolic ceremony" on the itinerary for extra caution.
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  • Susanne
    Curious September 2020 Alberta
    Susanne ·
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    Oh nice. Well I'm glad that there haven't been any issues yet. And I like that term "symbolic ceremony". How did you word it on your invitations?
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  • Vinod
    Top August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod ·
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    Taking the two weddings in the way your doing are fine. As a guest, it would seem nice to know the official marriage was done on the date given and having a Civil Marriage on the date given. Its the same way to know that elopement would be done and reception is done after the fact. I have in laws that got married (elopement) and then a reception 3 months later small intimate wise.

    Its the way you word your invitation and how guests will know what to expect at the wedding they attend. Vow renewal I feel is for years down rather than after your actual wedding.

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  • Ashley
    VIP August 2020 Ontario
    Ashley ·
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    I dont think as a guest people will mind. they will probably think that the outdoor wedding is your actual ceremony

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  • Tori
    Top October 2019 Manitoba
    Tori ·
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    As a guest I wouldn't care - as long as it wasn't being kept a secret! If we find out later I would feel out of the loop and like it was something you were trying to hide.

    Plus, if I knew you like they should I would know that you probably care a little more about the second one because maybe that is where you will do personal vows or something. I would still want to see you "get married".

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  • Madisyn
    Expert February 2020 Ontario
    Madisyn ·
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    We are having a destination wedding in April, but will be legally married in February. We have been clear with all of our guests that our wedding day will be a symbolic ceremony, but that it is the day that we will be celebrating for years to come. We've been transparent and we haven't had any issues yet!
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  • M
    Expert September 2019 Ontario
    Meaghan ·
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    I think you would need to be transparent, that they are being invited to a vow renewal. As long as I knew what it was and it wasn't presented as a marriage ceremony I would be fine with it.
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