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Tanya
Beginner May 2023 Ontario

Feelings about the Bouquet and Garter toss?

Tanya, on November 30, 2021 at 19:10 Posted in Wedding reception 0 19

Both of these leave me feeling a bit uncomfortable... especially the garter toss.

What does everyone else think? I was hoping to use this as cost savings for me (not buying a garter or a tossing bouquet) but I am not sure if people will be disappointed if this isn't included.

19 Comments

Latest activity by Tonjah, on December 2, 2021 at 00:03
  • Tonjah
    Newbie May 2022 Ontario
    Tonjah ·
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    Had this discussion tonight with one of my bridesmaids. I don't like it.. Why point out everyone who's single?! Nope.. Not doing it.
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  • Brittany
    Featured August 2023 Alberta
    Brittany ·
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    I absolutely cringe every time it is brought up because I am so uncomfortable with both. I am having what is considered a smaller wedding and everyone currently on my guest list is in a relationship/engaged or already married. So no thanks.

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  • Malyssa
    Expert October 2022 Alberta
    Malyssa ·
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    I agree with everyone here - personally not doing either BUT if you wanted to say do just a bouquet toss, I know my best friend bought an additional cheap bouquet JUST to toss, I think from like Michaels. This way she didn't feel like she was throwing her beautiful arrangement and if whomever caught the bouquet wanted to keep it, they could.

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  • Abbie
    Devoted June 2022 Nova Scotia
    Abbie ·
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    I find the garter toss tacky and the bouquet toss is awful as a guest so not doing either! The latest wedding I went to skipped both Smiley smile
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  • Stacey
    Frequent user October 2022 Ontario
    Stacey ·
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    We're also not following that tradition. Looks as though we're all in the same boat Smiley smile

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  • C
    Super December 2020 Ontario
    Carmel ·
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    Wasn't even a question - we did NOT do them. Personally I think they're "traditions" that need to go. We both absolutely hate them as guests and most of our friends do too (specifically the bouquet toss). Single or not. It's your wedding - you do what you want!
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  • Kelsey
    Frequent user June 2022 Ontario
    Kelsey ·
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    Growing up I never questioned these activities and 100% thought I would have them at mine. Now that I'm an adult and engaged, I am not down with the garter toss and therefore simply by association, the bouquet toss is out too. I'm not going to do just a bouquet toss. But also, I don't want to throw my bouquet, lol. It hasn't come up as a topic between my fiance and I yet, but I'm basically going to say I don't want you up my dress in front of our guests and I don't want to throw my bouquet
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  • Laura
    Devoted June 2022 Ontario
    Laura ·
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    We aren't doing either of them -- outdated and tacky. I have honestly never been to a wedding that did either of these...

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  • Stacey Tc
    Devoted August 2022 Saskatchewan
    Stacey Tc ·
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    Agreed. I've been engaged for 8 years and have still had people drag me up for the bouquet toss. Made me mad every time.


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  • Liberty
    Featured May 2022 Alberta
    Liberty ·
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    We are definitely not doing a garter toss. I think they are super uncomfortable and awkward. We most likely won't do a bouquet toss either as most of the women at our wedding will be married.
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  • Rayanne
    Master June 2022 Ontario
    Rayanne ·
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    I'd say most of the people at our wedding will be married or in a relationship. There is no way I'm singling out 2 or 3 people with these. Not to mention how angry it made me when my friends made me go up once when I was single. Still makes me angry when I think about it. We are also getting rid of someone giving me away. Ugh I am a grown up and I make my own choices lol but I've never had a relationship with my father so I can imagine others wanting that tradition.
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  • Hank
    Featured September 2021 Ontario
    Hank ·
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    Unless you have a ton of single/unmarried female friends who really buy into that tradition, I highly doubt that many people will miss it. Even when I was younger and more of my social circle were single, there was maybe a small (less than a handful) or people who actually took the bouquet toss seriously. Everyone else who got dragged up there dreaded it.

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  • Tanya
    Beginner May 2023 Ontario
    Tanya ·
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    That is absolutely why I don't want to do them. Thanks for your input!!
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  • Tanya
    Beginner May 2023 Ontario
    Tanya ·
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    That's good to hear. I was worried it would be noticibly absent. Thanks!
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  • Hank
    Featured September 2021 Ontario
    Hank ·
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    I would say half the weddings I've attended lately included the bouquet toss and way less had the garter toss. It's definitely an old tradition that's dying out based on my experience.

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  • Amanda
    Featured August 2022 British Columbia
    Amanda ·
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    Just remember, you don't have to do every piece of "tradition" Smiley smile

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  • Tanya
    Beginner May 2023 Ontario
    Tanya ·
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    Thanks!!! I don't think we will do it but I can't remember going to a wedding that didn't have the bouquet toss.
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  • Amanda
    Featured August 2022 British Columbia
    Amanda ·
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    You don't have to do it if you don't want to! It is your wedding, do whatever you feel is right for you and your husband! It's your day and not anyone else's!

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  • Stacey Tc
    Devoted August 2022 Saskatchewan
    Stacey Tc ·
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    We aren't doing them. I personally feel they are outdated and sexist.

    I've been to a few weddings in the past 10 years that haven't done them or other "traditions", and haven't heard anyone say "I can't believe they didn't do X or Y"

    If they make YOU uncomfortable, don't do them it's your day. You can have or not have whatever!

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