Family Drama Part 2

View quoted message For sure! I think that's what I am going to have to do. I am going to wait until Tuesday to see what the judge says about it. Don't want to cause a fit if my dad is able to have to judge lift the restraining order for one day.

View quoted message Well that’s just terrible. I can understand his frustration if she has caused him so much pain. We all say things we don’t mean during stressful times. It’s sad she just didn’t give him his things. Sounds like they had a difficult marriage and there is probably resentment. Maybe you should talk to your mom and be honest with her. My parents had a really nasty divorce and so did I! I completely know how you feel. I am so sorry this is put on you now and your poor sister who really wants to be part of your day. You shouldn’t have to chose between family

View quoted message Plus he found out she cheated on him so I think that might have pushed him over the edge to say mean words

View quoted message I know for a fact that he might have said words that he shouldn't have BUT he has never ever caused physical harm to any one of us. She was holding all of his client info for his business on her computer and she refused to give him his client list so he had to find a different job. I think there might have been words said that may have cause emotional turmoil for my mother but nothing to be fearful of. He has done alot worse in the past ( prescription drug overdose and almost caught the house on fire with his hallucination and she didn't get his arrested and didn't charge him then). I think this a manipulation tactic because now he can't see my little sister at all and she is graduating in 2 weeks.

I think it’s really important to get both sides of the story. Did your mom feel like she was In Danger, and that’s why she had him arrested and got the restraining order? If not and your mom is doing it out of spite, then i would tell her to lift the order or don’t show up. It’s one thing if she is fearful of him, it’s another thing if she’s just being ridiculous.

View quoted message Hopefully it all works out for the both of us! We deserve to enjoy our special day!

View quoted message That is actually a smart idea I might have to look into it. They are going to court on Tuesday so we will see what the judge says about it. He is asking to have the restraining order not be in affect on May 12th (Sisters Grad) and July 21st ( My wedding day).

I'm not sure of how the rules work, but can you somehow have it on record that he will be attending your wedding at x place and time and if she chooses to attend with the order in place, it's her causing the problem, not him breaking the order?

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I am sorry you have to go through a similar situation. It sucks that she wont put her differences aside for one day. I hope it works out too, my mom is very controlling and i think she did this to hurt my dad because due to the restraining order he cant see my sister graduate high school or come to my wedding. They go to court on Tuesday so hopefully it works out. My mom also was the one who wanted the divorce and cheated on my dad when she was on vacation in Mexico.... so apart of me does not want my mother at my wedding at all.

View quoted message I'm glad you're standing your ground with this! How should you or him pay the consequences because she is taking the divorce to a whole new level. Trust me I understand exactly how you feel and what you're dealing with. My parents are divorced and my mom definitely made it worse. She will not, absolutely not talk to my dad in person. She even told me she refuses to sit at the table with him and she'd rather sit at the back with friends. I also do not like her new husband at all, he's not a nice person. I really hope this works out. I think when you tell her that he will be at the ceremony no matter what then she will lift the order. Fingers crossed for you!

That's a great idea. I want to talk to my mom about it just don't know how because I found this out through my dad and she hasn't tried contacting me at all. I agree I could always do a supper with my dad family. None negotiable my dad is walking me down the aisle so she will have to get the restraining order lifted if she wants to come.

You need to tell your mom to drop the restraining order. I'm sorry you're dealing with this!! For me, I'm closer to my dad so if I were in this situation is tell my mom to drop it or she's not allowed to attend the wedding. Your mom needs to understand that he is your father and you love him and he needs to be there are the wedding, you may end up resenting her for this and no one wants that. My best advice is to talk to your mom, tell her this can't happen and talk to your dad and explain the situation in the case that she refuses and he can't attend, make sure he knows how you feel and maybe plan a small something with just Jim and his family.