Eloping Then Party After Question

I love the idea of doing something different! I agree with the others, having some mingle time like a cocktail hour makes sense so that you can see people as they arrive and late comers won't miss anything important or interrupt a speech or something. For a plated served meal a seating chart is needed, but if you're doing a buffet you can just assign the table and not specific seats at that table. I also like the idea of the last speech being from one of you (or your BM/MOH if you don't want the spotlight) to let people know that it's time to dance.


Have you thought about how you'll word the invites so people know they aren't seeing the ceremony? You might need to warn people in a subtle way on the invitations, maybe "join us to celebrate the marriage of".

I second assigned seating for any served dinners. Servers need to know who is where for specialty meals.


And in terms of formality, it's your wedding and weddings are supposed to be as classy as you want it to be so there's no such thing as being to formal.

View quoted message Awww so happy I could help!! 100% not weird to do elopement photos as centrepieces I actually think that is super cute and people will love it. Honestly I probably would still do assigned seating (if not assigned seats than at least assigned tables). I’m a child of divorce and have some other complicated family dynamics so for me personally open seating is a nonstarter (but I understand that won’t be an issue for every family / guest list). Personally though I also think open seating is kind of a pain from a guest’s perspective. I attended one wedding with open seating, and in the end I was content with my table, but that’s because I scrambled around and staked early claim to a table for my group and I so we could sit together 😂 it was stressful and a big distraction during cocktail hour. So if you can eliminate that stress for guests (not to say everyone is as Type A as I am ahah) then why not do it right? I also think assigned seating simplifies things drastically on the venue / caterer’s end—some even require it.


I guess the opposing view is that some guests don’t like being told where to sit / stuck with people they don’t know or have nothing in common with. I think you can mitigate these issues by being thoughtful when preparing the seating chart, making an effort to keep friend and family groups together, etc. If you can’t tell I have strong feelings on this subject ahaha.
Hope that helps can’t wait to hear more about your big day(s)!

View quoted message Very true! I feel like I can actually relax and enjoy myself the whole night instead of being a stressball lolol

View quoted message Thank you so much for your reply. I LOVE everything you suggested that sounds absolutely perfect!
Would it be weird to have an elopement photo as table centrepieces with some candles? Also would you do set seating?

Loved your suggestions I feel like you know me 😂

I’ll add that I definitely don’t think the format I suggested (and that you also hinted at in your OP ☺️) is too formal for a party!! Many many parties I’ve attended (I’m thinking work parties, not casual backyard get togethers) have followed this format and I think it’s popular for a reason.

Yayyyy!! Such fun. If you want to incorporate a sit down meal, then maybe follow the flow of a typical reception? Let people mingle and enjoy passed apps and drinks for an hour or so as everyone arrives, ask people to take their seats for dinner once mealtime rolls around, serve dinner and stagger speeches throughout, etc. Then time the final speech (perhaps to be delivered by you and your fiancé?!) to take place just as desert is wrapping up and invite everyone to hit the dance floor in your speech conclusion.


I do think starting with some form of “cocktail hour” is important because latecomers are inevitable. So if you start with dinner right out of the gate they’ll be trickling in, finding their seats, potentially disrupting speeches, etc. Good luck! And and congrats!

Hi Amy!
The beauty of this is you can do it any way you want! The bonus too is with the reception being later, you won’t hear much about people being sticklers for tradition since it’s non-traditional in itself!
You could do cocktail reception that turns into dinner and dancing, or you can change it to however you want. Want the cocktails later on? Want no dinner but hors d’oevres all night? Want a brunch reception? It’s all up to you! You can make it as formal or as informal as you want with any combination of options at your disposal.If you’re looking to narrow your ideas down, pick a theme first, then see what makes sense for you based on that.