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Jacquie
Frequent user August 2022 Alberta

Did you send save the dates?

Jacquie, on January 18, 2022 at 16:08 Posted in Before the wedding 0 26

Does everyone send save the dates now a days? Did you decide to skip them and were your out of town guests okay with that?

Our wedding is in August and I was going to send Save the Dates to out of town guests only. So they have time to prepare for travel. I wanted to send them before the end of January. However, my Fiancé and his mother have yet to decide on any guests from his side of the family. I only have 3 couples from my side that are out of town, but his entire side of the family is. And now I can't even find the save the date cards I ordered back in October. I think they may have been accidently thrown out.

At this point I think we just won't be sending any.


26 Comments

Latest activity by Caitlin, on January 22, 2022 at 21:57
  • C
    Curious August 2022 Ontario
    Caitlin ·
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    I would say if you do do save the dates, to opt for digital ones. That way you are giving people a 7-months heads up. If you choose to mail, and depending where people live, they may not receive them until the middle of February.
    • Reply
  • Tunisha
    Super October 2021 Ontario
    Tunisha ·
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    Hello Jacquie,
    We did not send out Save the dates. We just sent out our invitations when it as the right time. Also, we sent the invites out digitally by personally messaging everyone that was invited. Mind you, our numbers were 58 or so with 48 or so being guests which had about 2 or 3 a family. This helped us save money invites and stationery.
    • Reply
  • Jonelle
    Curious June 2022 Ontario
    Jonelle ·
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    I sent save the dates to everyone on our guest list (120 guests), just because of how crazy this year is supposed to be with weddings & covid! Normally I would say they’re not necessary but they may be really helpful this year!
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  • J
    Newbie May 2024 Ontario
    Jamie ·
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    I think we’re going to send them since our wedding is a quasi-destination since our families don’t live near us which is where we’re getting married! Plus we have a few people out of country and it’ll make it easier for them to enter the country. I think we’re going to do them 10-12 months in advance since a lot of my friends and family have postponed a few times and I don’t want a duplicate of dates.
    • Reply
  • G
    Curious October 2022 Ontario
    Giuseppina ·
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    Hello,

    I decided to send out Save the Date cards to my guests back in Oct 2021 for our wedding in Oct 2022. The reason behind this, was because of COVID, of course a lot of weddings and events got postponed, so I figured it is best to send them out so everyone is aware of the date far in advance. Especially since friends/family can plan accordingly when it comes to traveling, or other commitments and events they are going to.

    Hope that helps!

    GQ

    • Reply
  • S
    Beginner July 2022 Ontario
    Shelley ·
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    I sent Save the Date cards then sent Change the Date cards. On the second postponement guests got an email advising to use a removable sticky note on their calendar. Lol! Let’s hope third date this year will be the one!
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  • A
    Newbie August 2022 Alberta
    Asia ·
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    I’m having my wedding in August as well. We didn’t send STD cards because it’s a waste of money. We communicated to our out of town family members about the date. If they plan vacations during the time of our wedding and can’t make it, I view it as saving money. I think you can also send your invites for those out of town guests a little earlier than you would with the guests who are in town.
    • Reply
  • KELLY
    Super October 2023 Ontario
    KELLY ·
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    We are planning to send STD cards and using an e-vite to all of our tech savvy guests and will go traditional for the older guests that don't have access to internet/ computers

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  • Stacey Tc
    Devoted August 2022 Saskatchewan
    Stacey Tc ·
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    We sent ours electronically, and am glad we did as we right away had a handful of people say they won't be travelling.
    I also have a cousin in BC that can only afford to travel home once a year, and for the past 10 years it's always been September. He's already updated his friends and his father's family (divorce I've never met them).
    • Reply
  • Jacquie
    Frequent user August 2022 Alberta
    Jacquie ·
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    Thank you all for the responses. I think I am just going to reach out to our out of town guests directly and then send regular invitations late mate.

    • Reply
  • Lisa
    Newbie September 2022 Ontario
    Lisa ·
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    I just sent save the dates virtually through paperless post. It was such an easy process, you can see who opened the emails and it gives you an option to get them to fill out their mailing addresses for when you need to send out the invites. I would highly reccomend this option if you are looking for a $20 or less option. Smiley smile

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  • Maria
    Newbie September 2022 Quebec
    Maria ·
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    I sent save the dates but virtually was super cute everyone loved it !!!
    • Reply
  • Rayanne
    Master June 2022 Ontario
    Rayanne ·
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    We didn't send out save the dates. The only people that were invited were friends and family we talk to regularly. So we just told them to save the date.
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  • Jenny
    Frequent user September 2022 Ontario
    Jenny ·
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    We didn’t send any, we told all our family members verbally and most of my friends I’ve told verbally as well. I sent one digital save the date to my best friend from my hometown and he’s super excited about it 😊
    • Reply
  • Allison
    Frequent user October 2022 Ontario
    Allison ·
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    I originally thought I would send Save-the-Dates, but news travels FAST in my family so all of my immediate and extended family (and my fiancé's family) had accomodations booked within weeks of us getting engaged and booking a venue. Also, 96% of our guests (yes I did the math lol) live within a 90 min radius of our venue, and most of those are less than an hour away. Our wedding is a Saturday and it's not a holiday or long weekend so I'm not concerned with guests being busy or needing to book off work - and again, basically our entire 90-person guest list already knows when and where the wedding is taking place. Plus, we are having our engagement photos taken in May and our wedding is in October so we'll likely send the invites out in July...so it seems silly to send the save-the-dates only a month or two before the actual invites. If you are on the fence I think digital save-the-dates are great and allow you to easily send out new ones if restrictions impact your date!
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  • A
    Super September 2022 Alberta
    Alyx ·
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    I sent save the dates in October my wedding is in September! I just did it because we had just got our engagement photos done and I made them myself so it was pretty easy! But it’s definitely not a must!
    We’re doing our wedding invitations with a professional so either way guests will get a nice card to have!
    • Reply
  • Maggnard-Smanta
    Devoted July 2022 Quebec
    Maggnard-Smanta ·
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    I wanted them at first, but ended up just going with the invites because when we got engaged we told our family and friends about our wedding date by phone. Especially our family from USA. We plan on sending our invites 3 months before the wedding. Everyone knows when are wedding is at this point so we are good!
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  • C
    Super December 2020 Ontario
    Carmel ·
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    We did not. Everyone just knew when and where our wedding was 🤷🏻‍♀️ we had planned to send out our invites a tad earlier because of no STDs but with covid we ended up only sending them 8 weeks out. Wedding ended up having to be postponed only 10 days out anyway.
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  • R
    Frequent user September 2022 Ontario
    Rere ·
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    We were not going to send any Save The Dates, however our wedding is a Friday at noon wedding and a friend said it would be a good idea to do so, just so people can schedule off of work that day.
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  • Marsha
    Devoted July 2022 Ontario
    Marsha ·
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    Yea I was on the fence as well with STD because of the pandemic and what if we are on restrictions in Jul. But am thinking positive. I decided on STD to get me in the mood. It makes the planning more real.
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  • Liberty
    VIP May 2022 Alberta
    Liberty ·
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    We sent out STD cards about 1 year before the wedding as about 50% of our guests are traveling half way across the country. If I was in your situation, I would sent electronic save the dates or just text/call people and tell them the date and to expect a formal invite
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  • Hank
    Featured September 2021 Ontario
    Hank ·
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    View quoted message

    Tons of older people have an email now, especially since a lot of government services (especially those that deal with money) are online now. Even if they don't, they likely have a phone and you can always text them the link to the digital Save the Date on your wedding website. In our guest list, all the elders either have email or some kind of social media that accepts private messages (and we're talking immigrants who are 60+ where English is not their first language) so I think you should be fine. Since you were planning on giving up on sending them anyway, worst case scenario is a small handful of people won't get them.

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  • Jacquie
    Frequent user August 2022 Alberta
    Jacquie ·
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    That’s a good idea! Although most of our out of town guests are older, so it might not work for everyone.
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  • Hank
    Featured September 2021 Ontario
    Hank ·
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    You could always do a digital Save the Date for out of towners if you lost your old cards. It costs nothing and does the same job as a printed one. And this way you don't have to send them all out at once. You can send to those you know to invite now and then resend to your fiance's family later when they've figured it out.

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  • Malyssa
    Expert October 2022 Alberta
    Malyssa ·
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    I opted for Save the Dates, as I am going to send evites closer to the day. Even in the last week, we have had SOOOOO many people ask about the wedding, as they know this year is going to be a busy one with other events. We are also getting married on the holiday weekend, so want to ensure everyone we want there is aware to not double book. We also dont have a TON of out of town guests, but still have a few and with it being holiday weekend, want to ensure everyone can get hotel rooms, ect.

    BUT in my STD, I included everything they might need to know (date, place) as well as an info card to our wedding website, should they want to RVSP now. This way I can have numbers sooner than later, and hopefully don't need to chase a bunch of people when the day gets closer.

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  • Amanda
    Featured August 2022 British Columbia
    Amanda ·
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    My fiance and I did for every single one of our guests for our first wedding date because our entire guest list is traveling to the city we're getting married in. But since we've postponed now twice, we've decided not to the third time around and just send out invites.

    If you don't want to send out save the dates you don't have to. It's up to you and your fiance. I think if you send the invites out 4 months out your guests have enough time to plan accordingly. Plus everything that is going on with this pandemic and things changing constantly, you might find some of your guests wait a bit to book accommodations just because of the uncertainty
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