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Crystal
Curious June 2018 Ontario

Complaining Bridesmaid!

Crystal, on December 7, 2017 at 22:48 Posted in Before the wedding 0 17
Has any of you had to handle with complaining bridesmaids whether it be about money, dresses or whatever, if so how did you handle it?
I grew up with my cousins being my best friends so it came naturally for me to choose them to be apart of my wedding...but now that things are approaching really fast, im hearing money complaints from 1 bridesmaid! And let me make this clear that no bridesmaid has spent a dime yet...

17 Comments

Latest activity by Vinod, on January 29, 2018 at 11:20
  • Vinod
    Top August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod ·
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    Your bridesmaid should understand what she is getting done as a gift from you, why complain. If she isn't happy being part of the bridal party, she should reconsider or stop questioning everything.
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  • Angela K.
    Curious June 2018 Ontario
    Angela K. ·
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    I'm taking my makeup artist with me and she will do all bridesmaid. I invited one of my future sister in law, and she said she didn't want to have her makeup done professionally... Oh well...

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  • Angela K.
    Curious June 2018 Ontario
    Angela K. ·
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    I loved what you wrote! For once in a lifetime its the brides day!!!

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  • Victoria
    Expert November 2019 Ontario
    Victoria ·
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    UGH already dreading this with my FH's sister..... good luck.

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  • Michelle
    Super September 2018 Alberta
    Michelle ·
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    I did the same thing as well. Told them if they choose to a shower something low key is good, pot luck, McDonalds, movie night, board game night lol. Something simple and easy by no means go out of their way to do something extravagent.

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  • B
    Super August 2017 Alberta
    Bethany ·
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    I think there's always one in the pack. My youngest bridesmaid constantly complained. She didn't want to wear the same shoes as the other girl, she didn't like my lineup, she was always complaining. One time I just get she complains a lot n that she asks for a lot from my wedding lol n she said Hahaha true sorry. N kinda stopped lol
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  • Karen
    Curious July 2018 Alberta
    Karen ·
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    I as well was having a hard time til she pressed that last nerve. Maybe one on one wouldn't be so bad. Give it a try no harm. Good luck Smiley smile
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  • Crystal
    Curious June 2018 Ontario
    Crystal ·
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    Completely agree with you Karen!
    Im a very forward person to begin with I’m just having a hard time being that harsh! Lol
    maybe I should talk to her one on one.
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  • Karen
    Curious July 2018 Alberta
    Karen ·
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    I had a situation like this with my soon to be sister in law. I basically told them how it was it was my day this is what I want if you don't like it plain and simple don't show up it won't hurt me none lol let me just say how fast she changed her attitude with me. I mean sometimes you have to let them know it's not about them for once. If they don't want to participate then maybe they shouldn't be in your party family or not. They have to respect you. Your wishes your thoughts it's your day. I know it sounds harsh but it's the truth.
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  • Crystal
    Curious June 2018 Ontario
    Crystal ·
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    That’s a good option Ashley, I thought about giving them the option to do it themselves but my one bridesmaid (who is the one complaining) does her make up horribly! Probably the main reason I want professional makeup done for everyone. Maybe I should consider paying for everyone’s makeup to be done?
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  • Crystal
    Curious June 2018 Ontario
    Crystal ·
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    Wow to your BM story, always when it’s suits them they are okay! Horrible, when it’s not about them!
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  • Crystal
    Curious June 2018 Ontario
    Crystal ·
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    Thanks Bethany!
    Good luck to you as well!
    well be ordering the BM dresses in Jan. 😃
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  • Ashley
    Expert March 2018 Ontario
    Ashley ·
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    I gave my BMs the choice of getting hair or make up done professionally or doing it themselves and I gave them the option of choosing a cheaper dress so that they could save money where they needed or wanted to. I also told them that me and my FH do not expect wedding or shower gifts from them since they are spending so much time and money to begin with. I know I have heard some rumblings of money but my MOH (sister) has been really good at defelcting it so it never comes to my attention. Plus I run all the BM stuff by her first and if she is alright with it then I know everyone else will be too!

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  • Ap2017
    Super September 2017 Ontario
    Ap2017 ·
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    I agree, some people just love to complain - especially when they like to be the centre of attention and the event they're participating in (YOUR wedding) leaves them out of the spotlight. Or it's a control issue. They don't like something so they use money as an excuse or way to push for what they want. I would let them know that they agreed to stand knowing there would be a cost associated with it and if they feel that they genuinely can't afford it then they can step down - you don't want anyone to feel put upon financially, so if they need to bow out, then they should do so. In my experience, if someone has financial difficulties, they will generally approach it as a private conversation with you in an attempt to come to a resolution instead of just whining. Some people use that as an excuse to get out of things they don't want to do. I stood in a wedding as MOH and while planning the bachelorette and bridal shower, I got constant complaints from one BM about how she was a "single income family with a child to care for"(which is a genuine concern that I was sensitive to -one BM had 2 kids and was on mat leave with reduced income) when I was planning something in a way she didn't like but she all of the sudden had no money issues when the event morphed into something she liked more.

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  • Bethany
    Super July 2018 Alberta
    Bethany ·
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    Yeah some people just have to complain about something.. Lol but yes talk to her. She may not want to get in the middle of it so you may have to confront her directly. Good luck with everything 😊 We just ordered our dresses so I'm excited! Hopefully you can order yours soon!
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  • Crystal
    Curious June 2018 Ontario
    Crystal ·
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    They already know the cost of the dresses and everyone was completely okay with it!
    Maybe I’ll talk to my MOH! ☺️
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  • Bethany
    Super July 2018 Alberta
    Bethany ·
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    I think there is always someone who complains no matter what! But in the end, they generally pull it together and will make your day great! And if you agree to be part of a bridal party, then you expect to spend money. Maybe have your MOH talk to her or have an open discussion with them all over wine and discuss their price points with dress shopping. Just my opinion though 😊
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