I would need some input on the structure of my wedding ceremony.
FH and I are having a civil wedding service. A while back, we asked my aunt, with whom I am very close, to officiate our ceremony. Needless to say she was very honored and gladly accepted. (Woohoo!) We already sent the legal papers to have her ordained.
We are now in the process of preparing the ceremony but I now sense my aunt maybe did not realize what she was getting herslf into in terms of her role as officiant. She has expressed that she would feel uncomfortable to perform the entire ceremony alone and would like to only focus on the legal portion. She suggested that her husband (my uncle with whom i'm also quite close) open the ceremony with the introduction and words of welcome. My sister (who is my MOH) would do a reading to add a bit more "body" to the ceremony. Finally we would follow with the legal readings, exchange vows/rings.
FH and I have yet to discuss things over with my aunt in person on how the ceremony would go (I've only received her suggestions by email), but I feel it would be odd if the ceremony starts off with one person (my uncle) and ends with another (my aunt). In my mind the officiant should lead the ceremony from start to finish all while introducing other participants. I mean, when my aunt and uncle got married, their priest was the one who officiated and not, say, him and another clergyman....in every other wedding i've been to there was only one "leader" for the ceremony. I know there's not necessarily a "right" or "wrong" way to do things, notably in a non-traditional cermony but has anyone ever witnessed multiple people partake in the ceremony, religious or secular?
I want to be mindful of my aunt's comfort level, but part of me (god forbid, bridezilla-me!) is irked by her reluctance to preside the ceremony. I mean, i would have appreciated she express her feelings sooner. Plus, she is a very outgoing friendly person so I don't quite undertand where her desire to "split" the ceremony comes from. With less than 2 months before the wedding, it would be too late to ordain another friend or family member (to send official papers to the Justice ministry). We did not plan to hire a professional officiant as FH and I wanted a more personal affair. Professional officiants are also quite expensive in our area....(300-500&dollar
FH and I don't expect an elaborate discourse or speeches from my aunt. Short and sweet is ok. And we are not against including some readers to add some depth so she can concentrate on her designated legal role. But is it so much to expect that she preside in her role as officiant? I do not know how to approach this without possible causing a strain on our relationship. We will meet up in person in a few weeks to talk things over and sign some papers.
Thanks in advance for your help!
