Bridesmaids going through breakups

I did end up asking my maid of honour if she was still up to it. But I was able to give her more time to process. I was able to give her a few months. Now that it is getting closer I feel like I can't give that much time to this bridesmaid before I ask her. But I know I am going to have to ask her eventually.

My fiance is my first boyfriend as well. So it's hard to relate to how they are feeling because I've never been through it. I think they will both be okay with helping with the social as we made ours an 80's theme, so it's like a big party with some prizes and games for fundraising. At least I hope they'll be okay. They are both coming anyway.

Again, as it's been stated, your bridesmaids should know about the commitment to your wedding and be able to work through their emotions AND help you plan, as needed. I think you are doing the right thing in helping them process/hang out with them outside of wedding planning activities BUT at some point, you're gonna have to ask if they are still up to helping you with your wedding.

Like Tori said, if my FH broke up with me today, I'd definitely be a mess for a bit but life has to go on, and I'd continue on with work/other prior commitments. Any time after a break up, I felt it actually helped to be busy with anything, so your wedding could even serve as a distraction for your heartbroken bridesmaids.

I completely agree with Amanda.

It may come off as not caring but that's why you have to reassure them that as much as it sucks in general, right now is a sucky time for it to happen because you can't stop planning your wedding and getting everything in line.

I also don't have experience with ever having a break up as my FH is my first boyfriend I ever had, but if we were to split today I would be completely distraught. But, you have to separate work from home life and this is one of those times that you can't just give up on life.

I'm not saying to start telling them all of the single people that you will be inviting to the wedding - but you shouldn't have anything put off getting the social all together. This is a main money-maker for weddings and if not done correctly can cost ya money instead of make.

I don't mean to sound insensitive.. but they made a commitment to you regardless of their relationship status... I would just try and find a time to sit down with them and maybe just ask if they are still comfortable helping you plan your wedding and if they're not you completely understand. I see no problem in asking them for help as that is what they signed up for, just give it a little time and be honest. There is no harm in saying "I feel like a jerk bringing this up because of what you're going through - but are you sure you can still design my dress?".... These are important people in your life.. they will understand that you can't put your wedding on hold forever to be sensitive to their feelings.

We sold tickets for event separate as in ontario you can't sell at door. This is what people can buy when they come that night. I like it because when you come in the door you see it and can buy it and I always gift the drink tickets to hubby and I take the raffle. Then later we can go buy more drink tickets too. Just all one stop type thing when first come in.

Ya, I might talk to her after my social to see if she is up to it. I know she would do anything for me, so she will most likely still design it and she just finished fashion design school so it would be good for her portfolio. But I don't want to pressure.

The packages does sound like a good idea. Although we already started selling tickets to the event so I'm not sure if we can do that.

My bridesmaid doesn't live in the same city as me either, so she probably wouldn't be able to make it to every event anyway. We are very close, so I know she would do anything for me and I would for her too. I just don't want to pressure her.

Oh this sucks for everyone, but you still have a year so you could get a dress elsewhere. So I think you need to talk to her and just say I know this tough for you and I don't want to pressure you but I need to know if you think you will be comfortable designing my dress. Sadly these things happen and all she see now is wedding stuff and couples all lovey dovey because that is at the forefront of her brain. Although, I don't know when it would be a good time to bring this up.

Oh yes! mine is the end of this month and have had zero help from my party. It takes so much work! If you are really busy at work, I would schedule a day on a weekend and see if the wedding party could come over and help with the prizes, make sure games are made and anything else you need help with. This way everyone is helping too. That is really hard with the designing a dress part.. If after the social it is becoming too much, it should still leave you enough time if you have to go and buy one. Hopefully she can work past it and still design yours. What I have done to get ready for my social without my wedding party's help: we did ticket packages- like you pick a prize example $40 includes 4 drink tickets, 5 standard raffle tickets, 3 golden raffle tickets. and then put them in sandwich bag and they are ready for sale at the door. Makes things go a lot smoother and if want to buy individual or separate they still can and pre rip those too.

I hope she comes around! My sister was with someone and engaged and it was broken off before I was engaged with my FH and she has been good with my wedding. She doesn't come to everything but does help when she can.

My wedding social is in about a month, so I am going to need help with putting all the prizes together and decorating etc. I'm not too worried about that. My fiance and I could always do that, I just know I that I am also going to be busy at work this month leading up to the social and will be staying late at work some days.

But my bridesmaid that just broke up with her boyfriend last week is designing and making my wedding dress. And I don't know how long that would take her. I was thinking we could start designing after the social but after she told me her news, I'm not sure.

I would give them time to process like you have been, and I think it would be fine to ask them for help. They are still part of your big day and you have shown your support through their tough time as well. I would ask them to do smaller tasks or things that shouldn't be too much for them to handle emotionally. Its a tough spot in general, what are you all needing help with as you approach your year mark? I would try to use others for a few months but when its actual crunch time of 6-8 months ask for help then.