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Ashley
Expert March 2018 Ontario

Bridesmaids Duties

Ashley, on January 24, 2018 at 11:34 Posted in Before the wedding 0 13
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Hi ladies just a quick question,


Is it a lot to ask of 5 bridesmaids to host a shower, bachelorette, and a stag and doe? I am thinking may be much but I could also be acting cheap. What is everyone's opinions on this?


Thanks!

13 Comments

Latest activity by Carmela, on January 25, 2018 at 20:22
  • Carmela
    Devoted April 2019 Ontario
    Carmela ·
    • Dispute

    Thats maybe too much to ask of your 5 bridesmaids, will the groomsmen be contributing to this? Maybe I would just ask them to work on your bachelorette and bridal party. It can get pretty expensive to do all three too.

    • Reply
  • Vanessa
    Expert August 2018 Manitoba
    Vanessa ·
    • Dispute
    In Manitoba we have have socials not stag and does. We sell tickets and it's a way for people to come together and party celebrating the couple. There's prizes and drinks of course it's like a staple when couples get married. Not much goes on in our small town so we look forward to these things. The party helps with this by it's the couple who normally does it. Shower is normally the mothers and bridal party and bachelorette party is the bridal party.
    • Reply
  • Summer
    Devoted May 2019 Ontario
    Summer ·
    • Dispute
    I personally think that is a lot. I am not having a stag and doe and will have a girls night instead of a bachelorette as all my bridesmaids live a few hours or more away.
    the couple/ family usually host the stag & doe. I would ask your bridesmaids what they are comfortable in participating before assuming they will.
    • Reply
  • Sashanette
    Curious April 2019 Ontario
    Sashanette ·
    • Dispute
    I believe financially the couple should pay for the stag and doe, but I expect my party to be hosting it. Im giving a budget and they can do the rest!
    • Reply
  • Courtney
    Super July 2018 Ontario
    Courtney ·
    • Dispute

    I think you have the right idea.

    I'm not a fan of a Stag and Doe.. why get married if you can't afford it... but definitely the bride/groom should be covering it. Really the money they make at the stag and Doe would be used to cover their expenses and then fund-raise for the wedding. If you DO financially contribute to the Stag and Doe, you should be reimbursed with the proceeds of the event.

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  • Ashley
    Expert March 2018 Ontario
    Ashley ·
    • Dispute
    View quoted message

    I agree, just wanted to make sure that was the case and I wasn't going to sound like a cheapo bridesmaid for the wedding I am in later this year!

    • Reply
  • Ashley
    Expert March 2018 Ontario
    Ashley ·
    • Dispute
    View quoted message

    Its not for my wedding it is for a family member's wedding that I am a part of, but no worries we decided as a group we will do the shower and bachelorette.

    • Reply
  • Ashley
    Expert March 2018 Ontario
    Ashley ·
    • Dispute
    View quoted message

    Alright I am glad I am not in left field over here whew! Its for a wedding that I am a bridesmaid in, so I'm glad I wasn't going to sound like a cheapo when I say that's too much.

    • Reply
  • Ashley
    Expert March 2018 Ontario
    Ashley ·
    • Dispute
    View quoted message

    That's what I was thinking too! Its not for my wedding it is a wedding I am a part of.

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  • Jen
    VIP June 2018 Ontario
    Jen ·
    • Dispute

    The stag and doe is typically held by the couple themselves or their families throw it for them. That is a lot to ask of your party.

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  • Kristine
    Frequent user October 2017 Ontario
    Kristine ·
    • Dispute
    To ask them to host these events for you is a lot.


    Have they shown interest in throwing you a bridal shower and bachelorette? Has the topic been brought up by anybody?

    I don't think you can ask somebody to host an event for you, usually it's offered up by the person willing to host.


    And stag & doe is hosted by the couple, it's more of a "money grab" event.


    • Reply
  • Ashleigh
    Devoted August 2018 Ontario
    Ashleigh ·
    • Dispute
    That is a lot. Usually the bride's family will host the shower, the BM can offer to help with small tasks related to the shower. The bridesmaids plan the bachelorette party and the ENTIRE wedding party throws the stag and doe. Hosting events is expensive, go easy on your bridesmaids. We aren't doing any of these events because we hate going to them. Smiley xd
    • Reply
  • Erin
    Master September 2017 Ontario
    Erin ·
    • Dispute

    I think they could host the shower and the bachelorette. I believe a stag and does is usually hosted by the couple getting married as it is a fundraiser for them. I think you could ask them to help you come up with ideas and decorate though.

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