Bouquet/garter toss

I think it's up to you whether or not you do them. Like you said, there will be very few single women at your wedding to participate anyway. Instead, you can opt to play different games where you can have everyone participate. A lot of people are breaking away from tradition. Do what makes you feel comfortable =D

Just skip them. I think they're so tacky and unnecessary. My mom is kind of bummed out that we're skipping those two, but I figured that it's our wedding; not hers. We have to do what we feel comfortable with.

You don't have to do it. Especially if it doesn't fit your crowd. I've been to weddings where both have been skipped or just the garter toss.
Another option I've seen people do instead of a bouquet toss is invite all married couples to the dance floor and slowly the DJ asks them to sit down (any couples married less than one year, five years etc...) so eventually the couple who has been married the longest is left and gets honoured with the bouquet.

We won't be doing the garter toss as it has made me feel uncomfortable at every wedding I have attended as a guest. Undecided about the bouquet toss though.

Do what makes you happy, traditions are nice but you can make your own traditions too

We are doing them both because we think they are fun and we have the crowd for it. We don't really care much for traditions so that's not why we are doing it. We are skipping a few typical traditions. Don't let anyone make you feel like you need to have them because it's not their choice. My FHs family was on us about a few things and we just put our foot down told them no and they left it alone. If they aren't happy about it that's their own problem because it's your day not theirs!

There will be lots of single ladies in the wedding. So, I might do the bouquet toss (still considering). We won't be doing any garter toss and I won't be wearing any garter.

View quoted message Could you imagine? If someone stole a piece of my dress, there would be problems!! Apparently people used to basically trample the bride to get to her dress, which is where the garter toss came in. A method of self preservation haha! It cracks me up. A lot of wedding traditions have pretty funny beginninga.
We thought about doing an anniversary dance and then giving the bouquet to the longest married couple, however, our families are both older families and between the 2 of use we only have one grandparent (my grandma)...and then we realized my FH's great aunt and uncle are the longest married and NO ONE likes them. They are horrible to everyone except for one family member and they blatantly treat him better than everyone else. We decided that as horrible as it sounds, we don't feel like honoring them on our wedding day.

View quoted message Hahaha "here's the bar where you can find free alcohol! I'll see you in a bit!". I like it.
I made my own bouquet flowers, so I'm quite attached to my bouquet. I already have a plan of displaying it in our home after the wedding. I originally made a practice bouqet to get the arrangement right before I made mine, and was planning to use it as my toss bouquet...but it had an accident and fell apart. I don't want to make another one, they take HOURS and I have too many other projects. That's when we talked about scratching the tradition and we discovered that neither of us enjoy the tradition of the bouquet/garter toss.

View quoted message Great! Thank you! Every wedding I've been to have had one. I have never participated, I think they're kind of silly.
I'm beginning to think the people in my life have no experience with modern weddings. The number of times I've heard "you're not doing THAT tradition at your wedding?!?!"...I wonder when they'll catch on that we aren't doing MOST traditions at our wedding hahaha

I am not doing the traditional bouquet toss because I don't like being singled out like that and I want to keep mine tbh. So I am getting cheap flowers and then I'm going to just get any woman to participate and throw a bunch of single flowers or I am going to get a few small ones and give them to the younger girls in the crowd because we have family members are 14 and younger.

We're skipping both too, but so far, no one has said anything about it. Only our DJ was like "Really?" but mostly because I think he wanted to help us pick songs specifically for those things to show off his awesome DJ skillz if anyone notices we're skipping the garter toss, I'll point them to the bar and hopefully that will distract them. If anyone asks about the bouquet, I'll flat out tell them to find their own flowers lol

View quoted message

Okay, I just read your comment about the origins of these traditions, which is HILARIOUS! could you imagine people tearing bits off your dress? But it also made me think....because there is one circumstance where I think the bouquet toss is a fun tradition, and its done spontaneously as the bride and groom make their grand exit. Not a fan of the modern tradition of rounding up all the singles haha.

Not as common, but a LOVELY gesture if you wanted to do a different version of a bouquet toss, is find out which of your guests have been married the longest, and honour them with the bouquet. Very cute.

View quoted message Very true! Our wedding is in a barn and we are also having games in the barnyard so that should keep people occupied!
I made my bouquet, made all the flowers by hand with fabric. It didn't cost much but took 40 hours of my life, I don't really feel like throwing it haha!!

SKIP IT! lol I am definitely team "no toss".

Nobody notices when you skip these traditions. They're too gaddam busy having fun on the dance floor or getting excited over the poutine bar that just came out. They'll probably go home and go "oh...did I miss the bouquet toss? did they forget to do it? oh well!" and get on with their lives. Pretty sure the last 5 weddings I went to skipped these and they weren't missed at all.

Also...my bouquet is a whopping $150. Girl, no way am I tossing that thing willy nilly into a crowd!

View quoted message

This is my problem also. My dress is fit and flare, but it is fitted right to my knees. That would be one tight squeeze to try and get up there, in front of everyone.

My family is completely open, which would be ok.. but his not so much lol

If both you and your FH don't want them. That's the end of it! Honestly I've been to weddings that don't have them and you truly don't miss them! It's not like people will stand around saying "I WONDER WHEN THE BOUQUET TOSS WILL HAPPEN!!!" No one will think that lol!

View quoted message

I agree with all of this. Super awkward for the family to be watching, and my dress does NOT allow for garter fetching haha.

We are skipping the garter toss, and we are keeping the bouquet toss...but we're going to make my bouquet a scatter bouquet, so when I toss it, everyone will be able to get a flower.

I was initially going to skip both, but my fiance wants to keep the traditions alive.
I'll be throwing a small bouquet and he will be throwing an extra garter that I bought. But he won't be fetching for it.

Unless we have no time, then I'm skipping them!

View quoted message I totally agree about the garter toss being cringeworthy. It's so awkward watching the groom climb up under the bride's gown. Something that should be private on display for all of the family and friends to see. So weird.
(Plus my dress is very form fitting...not sure how much FH would even get under it to find the garter in front of everyone!!)

I'm skipping both! I really don't want to chuck my bouquet at a bunch of single women and do a garter toss in front of my family and friends. I am still wearing a garter, but that'll be just for my FH to know lol

View quoted message

Those are hilarious background stories to those traditions.

We're also skipping on both. I always found the garter toss cringeworthy and the bouquet toss a bit crazy (some single ladies just go nuts for that bouquet!).

Thanks all!! I was worried I was missing out on something important given everyone's reaction to lack of bouquet/garter toss. I knew I couldn't be alone in my decision though!
I read a bit about where the tradition came from and apparently the bride throws the garter to prevent people from trying to steal pieces of the dress, as it used to be seen as good luck to have a piece of the bride's clothing from her wedding day. And the bouquet toss was done as a distraction for the bride and groom to escape to the bridal chambers. Definitely not something I'm concerned about!
I am sticking with my original decision!!

View quoted message Awesome!! I'm glad I'm not alone! (Though I knew I couldn't possibly be!!).
I will stick to my original decision!!

It is completely up to you. The way I look at it, your day, your decision.

I have to go through our guest list to see how many are single on both sides. I have contemplated not doing it. It will also depend on my FH and if he wants to do the garter toss or not. I feel like it would be weird to do one and not the other.

I will be having them both but that's completely my and my FH's decision.

If it doesn't make sense to do them and you don't quite care to do them then by all means skip it! (If it helps any, I won't be having many single people at my wedding and I don't care if there is only one person standing behind me to catch it!!)

We didn't do the tosses either and from what I've seen on WW many other couples are doing away with this "tradition" as well. Most people aren't even going to notice the omission and it will still be very much a wedding without them!

We are not having either one, although my FMIL is making me a garter out of tie from my FH's father who passed away last year. As a guest I never wanted to participate in the bouquet toss anyway.

We aren't having one either...actually in the 3 weddings I've been to in the last few years, only 1 did the tosses.

Nope. Not having one.
Stick with your decision.