"Am I invited" question

I had a friend who said "well as long as *husband's name* and I are invited (they're not) and I was like "uhhh...". What i've been telling people is that we have a small venue, fiance has a huge family that took up about 70% of our guest list so we only had room for about 15 friends (all true).

People can be pretty forward and not realize just how rude they are behaving. I don't like to say it's small and intimate, because this could hurt some ppls feelings. They may feel like their a close friend. ..lol I would just say, I'm still working on it. That's what I've been telling ppl.

The one that snatched my breath was an extended relative (who isn’t invited) of my fiancée who stated “well we’re obviously invited” in the middle of a big family dinner.

View quoted message AMAZING 🤣 I needed that laugh, thank you!!!

View quoted message It was the first thing that popped into my head!

View quoted message HAHAHAH OMG I HAVEN'T EVEN THOUGHT OF THAT!!!! Not gonna lie, I dunno what I would say! Probably something like 'oh gosh you're just too funny...so nice to see you again' and back away like a ninja lol

Surprisingly my fiance's co-workers (all guys) have asked him and no one from my mostly female office has! I wonder if women understand that planning a wedding is a lot of work...


I haven't been asked in person, but my honest answer would be we haven't settled on a list yet. Part of me thinks that of they're that excited to go maybe they should be there, but if they are questioning an invite are you close enough to be invited.

View quoted message Do you ever worry you'll get people like Janice from friends who respond "oh, you think of me as family!"?

People think they mean well, but it's such a rude question to ask.

At the very beginning of our engagement, we'd say : "We're still enjoying being engaged and haven't started planning yet" or "We've actually just started looking at our options, so we're not sure what our guest list will look like."

Then, further down the road we said : "We'll be keeping it pretty small with close friends and family only."

View quoted message I love that idea!

I just say no its just family and close friends. wish we could invite everyone but our hall only holds 200 people. if you say we will see they may be expecting an invitation or they may follow up and ask again closer to your wedding.

We just started telling people we wanted to keep it small and family only. This way if they are friends, they will understand.

A lot of the women I work with thought they would be invited, but I didn't want to make any exceptions when my Husband said he didn't want to invite any of his friends, and just make it family!

I try to beat them to it and as soon as the wedding gets mentioned I say 'yeah we're so excited, it's just gonna be a small intimate evening with family and closest friends' and then they don't seem to say anything. lol even though it's like 100 people 🤦‍♀️ but they really are the closest family and friends! But those people asking don't need to know

Apparently some of my FH's coworkers are asking him if they will be invited to the wedding. We aren't really inviting anyone from work at all, (not to mention I haven't even met these guys)

He told me to expect questions at the Christmas party this year haha

It's an awful question to get because it really puts you on the spot especially if the answer is no

View quoted message 😂👍🏻 very true!

It's ridiculous and honestly I don't understand how people have the audacity to ask that question. I usually hit them with a - we'll have to see, as of right now all the venues we are looking for can't accommodate for our entire guest list that we have. Which was true - but that person asking usually wasn't on the list I was talking about

My statement is; we are trying to keep costs down and keep it intimate. We aren’t inviting the fair weather friends and making sure who we invite doesn’t ruin either the day or the venue more so when the bar is open. My FH and I are live streaming our day for family and friends who know they can’t make it as travel for them isn’t a option.

View quoted message RIGHT! It’s so rude!

Holy rudeness Batman. That seems uncalled for. I like your FH's reply of we'll see, that seems funny and honestly I think it gives them the idea that they shouldn't hold their breath for an invitation (that's what I would assume if someone said that to me). But the small wedding excuse, whether real or not, is a good one

I think you can be honest and say you’re having a small, intimate wedding and people will get the hint.


Rude of them to ask though!