a friend asked if he can propose to his gf on our wedding day

I would have said no too. Why people choose to try and take the spotlight from someones wedding I will never know..

I would have said no as well! Plus, if I was the girl - I wouldn't want to be proposed to at somebody else's wedding tbh... I would feel like I'm not only taking the spotlight away from the bride and groom, but super uncomfortable that it's in front 100+ people that I don't know/ aren't my family!!

Never really understood why people want to get engaged at somebody else's wedding...

I would say no as well.

Even if you are friends with both of them, it's not their moment or their money putting it together so totally okay for you to say no. If anything it's odd they asked. If they want to have a big engagement moment wouldn't they want their family to be there and not yours?

You’re absolutely right to say no! I knew a pair of friends where they were each other’s MOHs, and when the first one got married, her friend (the MOH) got proposed to during the reception and that’s all everyone else talked about for the rest of the night.
It’s incredibly tacky and insensitive imo for people to propose during someone’s wedding because it pulls focus, and a lot has gone into your day both monetarily and emotionally. You definitely handled it the right way by offering your help but to do it elsewhere.

I would say no as well. I have planned a wedding and now had to postpone and wait till next year if someone did that I would be upset that I have waited over 12 years for this day for someone else to use it for themselves.
For me that is something that shouldn't be done on someone else's day and I think you helping him to plan a day for him to do it Is more than acceptable

I would say no as well! That’s supposed to be your special day, you could offer your help orchestrating a proposal on another day but you’re definitely not wrong for saying no to him proposing at your wedding!

I would say no as well. That day is about you - but you can help him orchestrate it another day

View quoted message Thank you for backing me up there. I feel better now.

I agree It's your wedding day and the day shouldn't be taken away from you. You shouldn't feel bad for saying no!

It's your wedding day and if you don't want to share the spotlight that's ok!


It was nice of him to ask instead of just doing it without warning, and I think the two of you helping him pull off a lovely engagement surprise is a great middle ground.

I agree... someone else’s wedding is not the time or place for someone to propose to their significant other. That day is special to you guys and all eyes should be on you... I too would’ve said no.

Hi Neg!


You absolutely did nothing wrong by refusing this request. I would do the same thing. Frankly, it’s a little weird that this friend of your fiancé’s would even ask to propose to his girlfriend at your wedding or think doing so would be remotely ok. But at least he had enough sense to ask permission first so you can nip that idea in the bud!
Planning a wedding is a expensive, time consuming, and can also be very emotionally taxing. But it’s so worth it because the end product is an amazing day to celebrate your relationship. When the big day does arrive, the focus should be squarely on you, your fiancé, and YOUR love story! It is completely understandable to not want to “share the limelight” and deal with the distraction of another couple’s engagement. By politely declining and offering to help orchestrate the friend’s proposal on another date of his choosing, I think you handled the situation wonderfully.